“We are not necessarily doubting that God will do the best for us; we are wondering how painful the best will turn out to be.”
― C.S. Lewis


Mitch says I am angry “all the time”.  He is pretty close to being right. The days when I am in pain and the days I worry about the cancer coming back I am afraid.  The fear leads to anger.

If I hurt this bad now, what is ahead of me.

I know what is behind me . . . days when I didn’t think I could face “it” anymore.

How can I face “it”? Again?

God is with me.  I know this.  I believe this.

Just this morning I asked Him, “How can I be a Sunday School teacher with such anger and hurt in my life?  When I am so poor at controlling my emotional response to these?”

His answer, “Because you hurt you can help other who hurt.  You will understand.”

This morning my voice was so loud I couldn’t hear Him.  I had to cometo a stopping place where I could hear.

And be reminded by Him that He is here.

First of all though, I had to get to a place where the pain was so great that I stopped looking around and I sought Him!